#GMA rant 03/25/2010
 
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I'm all for some Robin, George, Juju and Sam in the morning, but Good Morning America is slowly starting to piss me off.

Mostly because I'm a Twitter evangelist. And because I actually use Twitter in a meaningful way. Which means I understand and have experienced the value and effects of sharing real-time information and connections.

So, when #GMA keeps inviting dumbasses onto their show, who say things like "I just don't get Twitter. I don't understand why people would want to know when you go to the bathroom and that you're drinking coffee," there is a lot of credibility to be lost. 

First, on the part of the dumbass who opens her old fart mouth and blindly comments on a platform she obviously doesn't use. Because if she did use it, she would know that while there is a population of other dumbasses who solely use Twitter as their personal journal of simultaneously creepy and banal entries, the platform has really altered communication as we know it. Ever heard of GOOGLE, lady? Maybe if you had, you would have done your research and found the thousands of stories of how Twitter has changed lives and industries, before pretending to be a snarky know-it-all and embarrassing yourself in front of millions. Where is the 'Dumbass' censorship when we need it?

Second, on the part of #GMA. Come ON, #GMA! Robin! I heart you, but why are you jumping on the stupid bitch bandwagon? You're better than that! Just because your guest has as much insight as a bucket of cement, doesn't mean you have to pour her into your news crevices and let them harden into painful clumps of permanent dumb. If she ate a hundred donuts, would you also? I didn't think so. You want to keep your svelte figure. Just like we Tweeters want to keep the Twitter love going. And it's hard to do that and watch your show at the same time. Because when you guys make ignorant comments and then adorable Sam actually USES twitpics as a form of news, it makes me want to turn to 'My Name is Earl' on channel 9 and then gauge my eyes out and pour homemade lemonade into them. And that would be bad, because then I would have to make more lemonade. And more importantly, I wouldn't be able to tweet and rant, and tell everyone that #GMA seriously needs to get their act together. After all, you don't want a bunch of seething digerati, coming after you with their 90-words-per-minute wrath. Because we'll bring it. And it'll be more than just a stylized picture of an angry blue bird on some random person's blog.

And third, sort of on the part of Twitter. You guys probably didn't know that your initial intentions of creating a space where people were talking about what sandwich they just ate would be crowdsourced into a Mecca of international sharism. And sure, you're famous now, and have a bajillion users. But from a how-can-I-make-my-business-better, or hey-let's-conquer-the-world, or even, the-right-branding-and-positioning-will-land-us-more-users standpoint - there is a LOT you could be doing to gain more market mindshare. Don't you have a department of people who think up ways to take over the digital world or something? You should definitely send them a memo entitled: "Let's find a way to show non-Tweeters, in layman terms, the value our platform can bring to them." You could at least try, Twitter. Because then I wouldn't have to write blog posts like this, and everyone's day would be better. Momma would be so proud. 
 


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